Oh this one was hard for me! Not because I don't let JT win. If you read my blog before this book you would know I have learned how good this can be for a marriage being the first to give in. Yes that alone is hard but with practice it gets easier and through your own sacrifice when you put down your gun and say I surrender, it most often takes the fight out of the opposing person. But be careful not to be sarcastic Lord knows I do this all too well. "Your right, Im wrong (sarcasm is free enjoy my gift and lets move on) lol. But when I really for the sake of our marriage take responsibility for my actions regardless of what Jt's side in the fight was, we come together stronger through our weakness. I hope that makes sense! But the reason why this dare was hard for me was because it spoke on a very harsh reality of mine, how often in fighting I bring up the word divorce. My parents divorced when I was 6, my Grandparents divorced before I was born, my moms best friend divorced, my Aunts... Divorced. I was raised by divorced "independent" women. Who "didnt need a man" this was not good for my upbringing, not if I wanted to be married and have kids. All I know, all I've seen is divorce. But God did bless me later in life with a wonderful Step Dad. It was through him that God began to teach me about a real man. A man who loves a women faults and all. So long story short I have not said this in a very long time because one night I had said it and Jt started to pack a bag! Reality sank in not only did I need him I wanted him. I was being selfish in continuing to throw divorce in his face. I sat on the couch but did not cry I watched him pack his bag and just thought "how stupid can you be!" Admit it you dont want him to go. Tell him! Before its too late! So i did! The funny thing is he was packing his bag to go to the gym. To get a breather from me. I vowed to him and myself that night I would NEVER say that word again! I made that date my pass word for my bank account so that forever I would be reminded of the day I realized how bad it would hurt if he really left.
The dare for day 13 is to sit down with your spouse if they are up for it and to make a set of rules for fighting the book had a few as examples, of course Not saying the word Divorce was one of them. The dare for day 12 was Demonstrate Love by willingly choosing to give in to an area of disagreement between you and your spouse. Tell them you are putting their preference first. Both of these are hard work but they teach you how to let go and not to be selfish, to put your spouse and the health of your marriage before your own selfish stubborn ways! All good lessons for me! Once again I am so glad I have already read "Proper care and feeding of a marriage" It is like the foundation for this book a "this is what you need to do". Then the Love Dare is like a good follow up a "guide to" or a "How to" put the other book into action! I love both and am thankful for all the growth so far! Day 14 (Love takes delight) is today so stay tuned if all goes well I will have it done and posted this evening! Thanks for reading! Leave comments!
LT
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